To be a Good Man

Once upon a time, we asked ourselves – are you going to be a good man or a bad man? All movies, and all novels are telling the story again and again about how important it is to be basically good, and how to be good. It seems to be a question that have absolute right answer. However, it is not that easy to answer sometimes.

I met with a Singaporean today, who is really bad. He didn’t follow the contract and didn’t show sorry about that. To be honest, I feel very good about people in Singapore, and still respect. So I felt so shamed that the guy with name Chen comes from Singapore… I didn’t get angry for years, but today, I am really angry. (What about the last time? When my car was scratched by a drunk driver)

For get about the story. I start to think how important to follow the rule of being a good person. It seems not so easy.

What is Good?

Thanks to novelists and artists who hold mirror for the society and people can see themselves, and get a better sense. I’d like to thank Shakespeare to show us the story of Romeo and Juliet. When we read the story, everything thinks he/she will be on the side of Juliet, and Romeo. The fact is not.

I seriously doubt with the limited information I get, I would be one of the people vote against their marriage if I were born in the age of the story. So whenever I saw a negative story on newspaper, and everyone reading the story will be angry, I start to think, well, there is possibility that we are the angry people in the Juliet and Romeo story. The worst thing is, you may never have a chance to know that you are wrong.

The Romeo and Juliet of the Current Age

A story gave me strong impression. It was a sad story, something like Juliet and Romeo story. Meanwhile, it is a true story.

The story is about two persons falling into love. One of them is a super star in Hong Kong. They deeply love each other, but the public does not allow them to be together. The public, everyone, thinks it is not proper for them to love each other.

They found every single chance to meet, and to stay together, despite all the media negative reports, and huge pressure from their families and friends.

Finally, one of them just jumped from the top of the building at April 1, 2003, and died. The whole Chinese world was shocked about the death of the super star…

If the story ends here, readers will say, why stop them, why not them follow their love? It seems we would not be part of “the public” in the story.

Think twice… Are you so sure?

The man is Leslie Cheung 张国荣. His partner is also a man….

We are not that Sure

In the story, when we hide the names, and more importantly, when we hide their gender, people would say one thing. After the how story is revealed, we are not that sure.

Not every story is told in its logic order. Not everyone can get enough information from newspaper. We are in the same situation in my daily life. Our story is not told in a way that we see in movies. In movies, or novels, when person A talked with person B, and it will show you what happened after person A left B, and show you again what A and B talked when they met again. If we are the B in real life, because of the absence of the part between the two meet up, we never be able to act fairly. When this happens, B may be a bad guy in A’s eyes.

That is how this world works.

To be Fair, To be Good

I have made up my mind to be a good man. It means you need to do your homework to understand others, and don’t take it granted for not understood.

Knowing that we are only part of the story, and can only see part o f this world, I believe we can form a better idea about this world.

11 thoughts on “To be a Good Man”

  1. Hi JS,

    Oh no, I hope you do not think that all Singaporeans are like that. There are always black sheeps and they behave in a way that will disgrace their country. Anyway, no point in getting angry over such meaningless people. Remember : A second worth of anger, is a second worth of happiness deprive from you. So might as well be happy~~~

    The motto that I live by to being a good person is “do undo others as you want others to do undo you” (I hope I got this right =P).

    Good night to you & Wendy.

  2. The thing who create the problem and made you angry was a man not a country. So control our mood is really nessary. Try our best to be a good man?It’s tough,cause it’s not up to ourselves.

    Good night

  3. david, have to disagree to some extent… especially when it comes to americans. current problems in this world are created by americans… some try to blame bush and his cronies but let’s face reality… he was elected by what we self-proclaim to be a ‘democratic society’ — so he represents the country good or bad. if this ‘democratic society’ actually disagreed with what he is doing, we would punish him — but in reality, the majority us of yanks don’t care as proven by the fact he is still in control. so one can conclude that we americans don’t care in general. sad but true… sometimes the man represents the country.

  4. Sphinx:

    Maybe you are right.(By the way, are you a American?)For me ,the politics seems like a game . Unfortunately, not everybody has the right to make or change the rule. But we can change the close enviroment what we live in,like our friendship circle .I’m a common boy, but with dreams.So I also tell myself to do my best and then admit failure. How about you ,thank you for reply me.

  5. Hate to say this and but coincidently, I had similar experience with a couple from Singapore. There are always some bad apples, no matter which races, contries …..

  6. Jianshuo, Maybe Zhang Guorong is not a good example. I dont think he killed himself mainly because his love life was not blessed by public.

  7. “Be strict to yourself and do not expext too much from others”,the idiom already revealed the truth to us when we were the little kids.Forgive and you will find the peace of mind,more blessings come from giving than receiving.Somethimes the one we love could probably hurt us,but you have to learn to let go and give chance.I felt that you have gained the gift from the lesson coz you really know how cheer yourself up which the others might not be able to help. Be happy & you will be better! :-)

  8. you 100% right about Romeo and Juliet story i gree

    we must think about Details in our life we will more mistake

    must solved and learn from this mistake to be good .

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *