Today is the 4th year anniversary for Wendy and I got married.
We register for marriage the same day four years ago, then I happily announced it, and then held the wedding ceremony about 6 months later.
We bought many flowers and candles to decorate the room, and went out to have a simple but happy lunch together (at Lan Cun Road).
I am sorry that I have to go to the 5G Review to deliver a presentation that afternoon, and could not be with Wendy, then we reunion at about 5:00 PM, then attended the wedding ceremony of a good friend from high school. Many other high-school friends in Shanghai also showed up in Jiading.
4 years! My goodness, Jian Shuo — it really doesn’t seem as though it’s been that long. I remember very clearly how happy I was when I read your account of that very happy day. I even remember some of the pictures you posted afterwards of the formal wedding ceremony. Congratulations to you both on another milestone in your lives :-)
Time goes so fast… As one of the organizers in the wedding ceremony, I felt the strength of growth in the four years:from Shanghai to the States, from technogy to business and from executing to planning… Congratulations and best wishes to you and Wendy!
Carroll, thanks so much for the warm congratulations. I know there is someone in the States who cares about Wendy and me besides my family. I already think of you and J as part of my family and am very willing to happiness and sadness (not much yet) with you.
Wang, thanks for being with us, and helped so much during the Wedding. I am happy that you did the transition in the last (OMG) four years. Stay connected.
Carroll have a great tree trimming party, and it lasted for half centuary. How I admire Carroll to have great friends for life time. I believe I also have many who will still be close friends when Wendy and I celebrate 40th anniversary.
:-) When will we see your kid on the blog ? :-)
Congratulations to you and Wendy. From reading your blogs, I can tell you two are a happy and lovely couple. Like you guys, I met my husband at the same university we both went to. We are also one year apart in age. One thing you two will always will share in common is many college friends that you both know well. Our best friends are our college chums decades later.
Speaking of marriage, one thing bothers me a great deal is seeing so many young Chinese women (especially the Shanghainese) marrying foreign men old enough to be their fathers, or dating married foreign men knowing they are married. Oh well, this is a touchy subject…
Yes, Tamie, it is a very touchy subject.
One day on a ferry journey I met a young guy. We chatted, and he was very interested in China comparing foreign countries, which he have never been to (possibly like you, Tamie ?)
He said a lot of the bad things in China. Mostly of the government.
We never spoke of our respective girlfriend, wife or whatsoever.
Just before entering the harbour, we stood on the deck and enjoyed the sunshine, and he said “I don’t like that chinese women marries foreign guys. The girls are so bad, they only marry for money.”
I think he saw me as a competitor, maybe he couldn’t get himself a good girlfriend, and in this way got his bad thoughts out and blamed the foreigners for that. (Maybe…..)
My chinese wife Xiuying (yes, I am married to a chinese and ve are both very happy about it) have had some “experiences” of chinese men talking bad to us, when she walks along the street with me.
She hates that chinese men talks bad of me. “These guys have absolutely no style”, she says.
Chinese women very seldom talks in that way in public. In fact, most women says good things of me.
My chinese is not so bad that I can’t hear what these men are talking about.
Please have that in mind next time (if you are a chinese) and talks bad things to a foreigner.
Some might listen and get really angry of your talks, so beware. Many foreigners are strong.
Some chinese have an attitude to think of themselves as the ONLY available option for the opposite sex,
just like you, Tamie. By the way, do your husband have the same ´bad attitude as you ?
China has been opening up for many years, and the chinese now knows a little more of the outside world now.
Perhaps you should think of WHY chinese in some cases prefer foreigners instead of chinese.
Perhaps because foreigners has far more knowledge of the rest of the world outside China,
due to the free press, and the holiday travels to other countries which most foreigners do quite often.
That makes them more interesting in the chinese’ eyes.
And marrying a foreigner opens many new doors for you outside China.
Worth to think about, when someone is just fed up by all the control, the rules and the whole system here.
There are many couples of foreigners and chinese.
Most are foreign men marrying a chinese, but the other way is seen in many cases.
Perhaps one day your husband will leave you for a foreign woman !
I can see that the divorce rate in Shanghai is sky rocketing now.
So be careful.
Love shows it’s face in many ways.
Many chinese women marry old rich chinese men, or rich chinese popstars, just because of their money.
So let them. Can even be a way out of hopeless poverty and obligations.
Old fat foreigners don’t last long, he will die happy.
And when he dies, the wife get’s her reward.
More money than her whole family can earn in three lives.
Everybody is happy ! What’s wrong about that ?
Work hard on that attitude of yours, Tamie.
You have a lot of understanding of the world to catch up on.
The world is not simply black and white. It is dark grey and light grey.
Never pure black and white.
This is 2007.
By the way, Tamie, many chinese women dates married men. Even chinese. I know a few.
Manybe you will b eone of them in the future.
Never say never…
carsten, I agree on your oppinion (I will write an entry about it, and you will find out soon) but I feel worried that your words toward another reader of this blog. Please stay with the oppinions instead of personal attack – I know it is the mild version but I am afraid people will feel offended
good luck. I’m 10 years married in June…. and have 3 new on the earth. Women are difficult to understand, but that makes it “spicy”. :))
Carsten your wife is a great lay! Pass the joint!
I hear you and am sorry I offtended you. Since I don’t know you, my comment wasn’t relating to you. Nontheless, I would like to apologize to you . When I made that comment, I knew I had opened a can or worms. That’s why I said the subject was touchy. I could’ve gone on further to rebut your attacks and insinuations of me, but I’m not going to. Sure there are decent women marrying guys 20-40 years their seniors for true love, but there have been also too many sad stories among these couples and poeple, both genders, were terribly hurt and felt used. And yes, I could have elaborated with many true cases, but what’s the point? I’m not going to write a dissertation on this subject in Jianshuo’s blog.
On another note, I do not appreciate your belligerent tone implying my husband may leave me or I may date other married men. Sorry, but I have to say, NEVER, NEVER OVER MY DEAD BODY!!! If your purpose was trying to cuss me or to anger me, then you would be disappointed because I am not agitated at all.
Well, enough is said, and I will stop right here before I sound like attacking you.
Duke, you’re a sick person.
Not as half as thick as you.
Hi, I don’t know what links bring me here tonight, but I would say the topic been discussed about the blogger’s 4 years’ anniversary was really sth we should all feel happy to share, coz it’s indeed the happiness that made Jianshuo to write this, however, how come such good topic lead this absurd argument? I don’t get it. Yes, Carsten, the world is not just black and white, which obviously enough tells you and your wife’s story is not enough to prove anything, and on top of everything, it’s just not fair to judge Tamie’s attitude in this ironic way, that does not help anything(if at the very place, you were trying to prove sth or solve some kind of problem).
Btw, Jianshuo, Congratulations on your four-year anniversary, I know keeping a relation is never easy, not to mention marriage, both of you need to show your patience and tolerance, and then a lot of love. So cheers.