We Filled Our Lives But Lost Our Souls

Wendy wrote an article named We Filled Our Lives, But Lost Our Souls (Chinese) and posted it on her blog. It is very real comment from a normal person in Shanghai. The original version was very well written. Let me try to translate part of them.

These are among our frequent topics: I went to English, and you visited Europe, and he went to America; your house is at Lian Hua Metro Station, and mine is at Pudong, and he has several villa; The Peace Masion on Fen Yang Road is not bad, and Ying Qi on Ju Lu Road has great taste, and the Rose Garden is Pudong is OK; We care about taste, and we care about sentiment; we care about thoughts; We will have afternoon teas, and we will enjoy German black beer…

We filled our lives, but we lost our souls.

We do not insist any more, and we are not paranoia any longer. We start to say “Yes” to everything. The uncertainty of future and pressure of life forced people to put benifit and stability the first place before any decision….

I know Wendy is a good thinker and this piece is very well written. No matter people think it or not, it is a very common situation for people’s life in Shanghai. Shanghai is becoming more and more internationalized, but the life is much more harder. It is not easy to survive in Shanghai, since “we have to fill our lives”.

More interestingly, one of the email Wendy got is another great piece on the meaning of lives:

Dear Wendy,

I saw your latest blog entry “we filled our lives, but lost our souls.” You

sounded a bit down and I just wanted to share a few of my thoughts. We’ve

only met once, but for some reason, I felt a special connection to you. I

also really admire the brutal honesty in your blog. I hope I’m not being

too blunt or personal in my writing:

First off, lemme just say it’s damn hard to keep one’s soul in contemporary

China. Everytime I went back to Shanghai, it felt very different to me. In

recent years, increasingly, I felt an overwhelming sense of materialism.

Adding to that is tremendous peer pressure and the need to ‘keep up with the

Jonese.’ What others have I have to have it, too. What others do I have

to do it better. That’s painful. By going with the flow we essentially

give up our own choices, ideals, and individuality. Or, in other words, our

souls.

But how can you not go with the flow? If the entire society is crazed about

making money and buying houses, how do you dare to be different? What about

parental expectations? They’ve had a hard life raising us. What about our

children? We can’t have them lose out from the start. Life is a race and

you simply cannot afford to stop.

Stop to think, what do I really want from this life? Do I really have to be

in that race? I think a lot of times we don’t give ourselves enough credit.

We don’t give ourselves enough space and freedom to explore, to make

mistakes, and to find out who we really are. All of our lives we’ve been

told who we should be and what we should do by our parents, teachers,

friends, society, or by a self that has internalized the values of all

those. We are defined by our roles as daughters, wives, mothers, employees

and citizens. But we are more than that. Each and everyone of us is

unique. We each have our own talents, passions and beliefs — We may have

yet to discover them, but they are there. Life is a privilege. Don’t rush

through it without knowing what you’re doing.

I try to tell myself, I came to this world for a purpose, and that purpose

is more than to have a job, get married, buy a house, make babies and

retire. I’m going to find out what that purpose is. I know this probably

sounds extremely naive, and I often have doubts about it. Sometimes I feel

like I’m not a good enough daughter. Sometimes I feel like my peers think

I’m crazy and a failure. Sometimes I’m gripped with this fear that I’m

going to end up old and homeless, not having had a job ever long enough to

build a career. :) But I think I’d rather live with the fear and guilt than

the nagging, perennial question: why am I here?

Partly that’s why I hide in San Francisco. In Shanghai reality is presented

in a much harsher, right-in-your-face kind of way than in SF. Here people

could care less about what you do with your life. Sometimes I try to

picture what I would be doing today if I stayed in China. And all I could

think of is a stifling cube in an office building somewhere in Beijing or

Shanghai. I don’t think I would’ve had the courage to do anything

different. I have a lot of respect for the independent spirits in China

today, simply because it’s just so much harder there to stay true to

oneself.

I can’t believe I wrote so much. It feels like I was writing as much for

you as it is for myself. And one final note for all of us

soul-searchers–have a sense of humor. Don’t take yourself too seriously.

Having a sense of humor makes one more open to new experiences and makes it

easier to stand up again after you fail. Allow yourself to explore, allow

yourself to fail, allow yourself to be confused, because it is from failures

we learn and confusion forces us to think. Most importantly, soul-searchers

or not, we’ll still eat, crap, and sleep everyday. :) We’ll still laugh and

cry. We’ll still have all the bills to pay and bosses to please. In some

ways I think soul-searching is more of an attitude toward life than concrete

actions. What’s the difference between the soul-searchers and

non-soul-searchers then? Well, not much, except we set ourselves free, from

inside out.

I don’t know if any of this makes you feel better. It’s just a topic I

struggle with a lot myself, so thought I’d share some of my own thoughts.

If any of it is offensive, I apologize! I hope that, other than your

sometimes elluding soul, all is well on the other side of the Pacific. :)

Credit goes to the original author

This piece is so nice.

Cheng Shan Road Opens

After one year of construction, the Cheng Shan Road near my apartment finally opens these days. It provides a new way to directly go to the Lupu Bridge directly from my home.

Along the road, there are still many villages. Although it is the site of the Shanghai Expo 2010, currently, there are still villages in the cities. The villigers are planning their new life since the villages will be moved to other places, and modern buildings will raise at the same place. The road is the first step to kick off this kind of construnction. I believe in the year 2010, this area will be completely another new look.

The opening of the road is great news to me. When people are discussing big events in the world, the small news like the completion of a road around my apartment is something really meaning for me.

P.S: Google Local was release recently. The domain is bendi.google.com, a very local name. Meanwhile, it gives a much shorter name for the Chinese version of Google Local.

Price Increase of Shanghai Metro

It is HEARD that the price of Shanghai Metro will continue to increase due to the high pressure from the passenger volume at rush hours. The lowest price will be adjusted to 3 RMB from 2, and it takes 5 RMB from Long Yang Road in Pudong to Xujiahui in Puxi. Now, it is only 3 RMB.

Meanwhile, since the Dong Fang Metro Station is the conjunction station of three metro lines, it will be closed for 1 years for construction. The transition square of the People’s Square seems will be completed soon, and I guess at that time, the transition between Metro Line 1 and Line 2 will be shortened…

Just some random news about Shanghai Metro…

When Nothing to Blog

If there is no topic to blog today, how about try thinking about these ideas:

Event?

Will it be a conference, meetup, or events coming soon? If so, write about it. What is the propose? Who will come? Will you go there? If yes, why? If not, also why?

New product?

See if there is a new product, new release or new plugin. Try it, describe it and write some comments on it.

to be continued…

Updated July 25, 2007

Reflection

If there is nothing to write, how about do some reflections? Thank about the past, and think about the days you blogged, and think about what you have believed in. Are you still doing what you believe is true? Are you still believe in what you believed? Why? Why not? That is the value of a blog – to help (or the better word – to force) you think. To explain one’s thought beautifully is a power everyone should manage.

OOB

If you really don’ t have too much to say, an OOB (Out of Blogging) notice is also good – to tell people why you don’t want to blog, and that can be an interesting blog as well. The bottom line is, you keep up your blog and don’t let people worry – what is going there?

Of cause, it is OK to pause for a day or two.

Pictures

A picture is better than thousands of words. Try to post a recent picture and it will well explain what is happening…